Don't Take The Bait
Do you ever notice that when people react, you often react to their reaction? This creates a world of reactions and a very "messablewith moment" for you both.
It's common to fall into the trap of reacting to other people's reactions. The issue is that when someone gets hooked by your reaction, they take their focus off what they're dealing with and start dealing with your reaction instead. This can lead to confusion and misunderstandings, especially when there's already tension in the air.
As an example, jealousy If your partner questions you about talking to someone or looking at someone and you get defensive, accusing them of not trusting you, it only makes the situation worse. This is an example of you reacting to their reaction. In this scenario, your partner is no longer dealing with their jealousy; they are dealing with your accusation of mistrust. Instead of reacting to their reaction, DON'T TAKE THE BAIT!
See if you can practice providing a calm space and a rational response. Let them react as they will, and answer their questions without adding more fuel to the fire. Don't give them something to deal with; let them deal with their reaction versus your reaction to their reaction. WOW, thats a lot of reactions, huh?
Remember, you may not have a say over someone else's reactions, but you have THE SAY over whether you react to them.
So, practice not taking the bait, which only sends you into the world of being messablewith, and see the difference it can make in the quality of our interactions with those around us. Being unmessablewith™ takes practice. GAME ON!
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