Today, let's delve into a topic that touches every aspect of our lives: reality. But not just any reality—let's talk about the stories we tell ourselves about what's happening around us, and how they shape our experiences in both work and relationships.
You see, many of us tend to live in a narrative, a storyline we've crafted based on our perceptions and beliefs. Whether it's about our careers, our personal lives, or our relationships, these stories can either empower us or hold us back. Take, for instance, our work lives. Maybe you're stuck in a job you dislike because you've convinced yourself that you don't have any other options. Or perhaps you're hesitant to pursue a passion project because you're afraid of failure. These are just a couple of examples of how our perceptions of reality can limit our potential in the workplace. And then there are our relationships. How often do we find ourselves caught up in misunderstandings or conflicts because we're viewing situations through the lens of our own stories? Whether it's assumptions about what someone meant by a certain comment or judgments based on past experiences, these stories can create unnecessary tension and distance between us and those we care about. So, what's the antidote to this? It's simple: getting real about what's actually happening. Just like keeping a journal can help us stay grounded in our experiences, taking a step back to assess the reality of a situation can help us see things more clearly. Instead of jumping to conclusions or letting our emotions run the show, let's take a moment to pause and ask ourselves: What's really going on here? What are the facts, free from interpretation or bias? By embracing this mindset of radical honesty and curiosity, we can start to dismantle the stories that no longer serve us and create new narratives based on truth and possibility. Whether it's in our work or our relationships, let's strive to see reality for what it is and embrace the opportunities for growth and connection that lie within it. So, here's your challenge for the week: Take a closer look at the stories you're telling yourself about your work, your relationships, and your life in general. Are they rooted in reality and/or are they holding you back?
0 Comments
So, let's dive into something really important: awareness and reaction. You know, being aware of your reactions is a massive milestone. It's like unlocking a door to self-discovery. But here's the thing: awareness alone won't cut it. It's like having a map of where you want to go, but not having a route planned out. Sure, you might find a moment of calm amidst the chaos, but without forging a new path, you'll inevitably find yourself back in the same old cycle of reactions.
It's a bit like what Tony Robbins talks about—you can't just quit something without replacing it with something else. So, how do we do that? How do we create new pathways? It all boils down to context and vision. What do you want to create in any given situation? Is it joy, empowerment, or something else entirely? Once you have that vision in mind, you can start to shift your actions accordingly. Instead of defaulting to irritation or annoyance, ask yourself, "What would joy do in this moment?" But here's the kicker: neutrality isn't enough. The universe abhors a vacuum, so if you're not actively creating something, the default reactions will take over. It's like navigating through grooved, paved roads versus forging new paths through a dense forest. It takes effort, but it's worth it. I love the analogy of having an "empty canvas." Once you've calmed your initial reactions, it's time to pick up your brush and start painting. Take action, come from a place of intention, and watch as your new pathways become stronger and clearer over time. And hey, remember, it's all about focus and action. Your breath can lead you to that middle ground, but it's what you do next that truly matters. So, take a deep breath, center yourself, and then ask, "Now what?" Because in the end, it's not just about reacting—it's about actively creating the life you want to live. Let's dive into a topic that affects us all: triggering events. You know, those moments or situations that have the power to send us spiraling into a whirlwind of emotions and reactions. Whether it's a phone call from the doctor, a challenging encounter with a particular person, or a stressful situation that hits a little too close to home, we've all been there.
But here's the thing: triggering events don't have to control us. In fact, one of the first steps towards reclaiming our power is identifying what those triggers are. That's why in the courses I do with people, I always have them pinpoint their triggering events, people, or situations. It's about being armed with the awareness and tools to navigate those moments with grace and resilience. Because here's the reality: no matter how successful, experienced, or seemingly put-together we are, we all have our triggers. It's part of being human. And that's okay. What matters is how we choose to respond to them. From a brain science perspective, triggering events often result in what's known as an amygdala hijack. Essentially, our brains go into overdrive, drawing on past experiences to predict the future. So when you find yourself reacting intensely to a triggering event, know that it's completely normal—it's just your brain doing its job. But here's the exciting part: it's hackable. Yes, you heard that right. You can actually rewire your brain to respond differently to these triggers. It's all about creating new neuronal patterns, forging new pathways in the brain that lead to healthier, more constructive responses. Now, I won't sugarcoat it—it's not easy. It takes discipline, commitment, and often, the guidance of a coach. Trust me, I couldn't do it without mine. Sometimes, we need someone else to shine a light on the blind spots we can't see ourselves. That's why having a structured support system is crucial. Surrounding yourself with people who understand what you're going through, who can offer guidance and support, can make all the difference. And of course, it requires staying true to the vision of what you're creating for yourself—a life where triggering events no longer hold power over you. So, if you're tired of feeling like you're at the mercy of your triggers, know that there's hope. With the right tools, mindset, and support system, you can rewrite your brain's automatic responses and reclaim control over your reactions. You know, like, have you ever noticed how people react to requests? It's like they've never seen one before! Dealing with yeses, nos, and yes-buts can sometimes feel like a workout for your communication muscles. But fear not, because I've got some insights to share that might just make things a bit smoother. Let's start with the art of making a clean request. Instead of beating around the bush with vague statements or "I'd like to," why not just put it out there? When you make a clear request, you give the other person the freedom to respond authentically—with a yes, a no, or a yes-but. Now, here's where things get interesting. People get all sorts of funny when it comes to saying yes or no. If someone says yes, you might catch yourself saying, "Are you sure?" It's like we can't believe our luck! And if it's a no, oh boy, the reactions can be even more entertaining. You know that knee-jerk "Why not?" we blurt out when someone says no? Yeah, let's ditch that. It just puts pressure on the other person to come up with excuses. And taking it personally? Not cool either. A no doesn't mean they hate you—it's just a no for now. So, what do you do when faced with a no? Just accept it gracefully. It's not the end of the world. Thank them for considering it and move on. No drama needed. Now, let's talk about the infamous yes-but. It's like a yes with a side of hesitation. Maybe they're not fully on board, or perhaps there are some obstacles in the way. The key here is to listen carefully. Are they committed to finding a solution, or are they just making excuses? By asking clarifying questions and truly listening to their responses, you can get to the heart of the matter. Maybe there's a way to work around the obstacles, or maybe it's time to reassess your expectations. The bottom line? Keep it real, keep it clear, and keep it drama-free. Whether you're asking for a raise or inviting someone to lunch, approach it with confidence and respect. And remember, the only drama you need is the one on Netflix—not in your head! Don't forget to breathe. Communication can be a workout too! The Power of Action: How Taking the First Step Leads the way!
It's easy to fall into the trap of waiting for motivation to strike before taking action. However, more often than not, it's the act of taking that first step that sparks the motivation we seek. Consider this scenario: You don't feel like going to the gym. The thought of working out feels daunting, and the couch seems much more inviting. But instead of giving in to that feeling, you decide to take action. You lace up your sneakers, grab your gym bag, and head out the door. As you walk through the gym doors, something shifts. You start moving, lifting weights, or hopping on the treadmill. Suddenly, you feel a surge of energy and determination. What changed? By taking action, you created momentum. And with momentum comes motivation. The same principle applies to other areas of life, such as starting a conversation or pursuing a passion project. By initiating action and sharing your accomplishments and goals with others, you not only hold yourself accountable but also inspire motivation in those around you. So, the next time you find yourself lacking motivation, remember this: Take the action, and the feelings will often follow. Whether it's hitting the gym, starting a conversation, or pursuing your dreams, don't wait for motivation to come to you. Create it by taking that first step. In a world where we are constantly bombarded with advice on setting goals, creating vision boards, and jotting down our aspirations, the simple act of vocalizing our ambitions often takes a backseat. However, I've come to understand that SPEAKING our goals can be a game-changer in the pursuit of our dreams.
ABRACADABRA in ancient Aramaic or Hebrew literally means “I create as I speak”. BAM! There is an undeniable connection between our thoughts and the spoken word. When we articulate our goals, we engage multiple senses, reinforcing our commitment to those intentions. It's as if the act of speaking transforms our dreams from intangible ideas into concrete objectives, creating a roadmap for our journey ahead. Sharing our goals with others also adds a layer of reality and accountability. When we express our intentions aloud, we invite others to not only be witnesses to our aspirations but often to participate in realizing them as well. This shared commitment can be a powerful motivator, pushing us to stay true to our goals and work diligently toward their realization. Moreover, speaking our goals out loud (to others) can serve as a source of inspiration for those around us. Our words have the potential to resonate with others, encouraging them to reflect on their own ambitions and take proactive steps toward achieving them. In essence, our spoken goals can create a ripple effect of motivation and empowerment within our communities. Personally, I have incorporated this practice into my daily routine, setting aside time to articulate my goals with clarity and measures. The impact has been remarkable, fostering a sense of purpose and direction that goes beyond what I experienced through silent contemplation alone. I invite you to explore the transformative power of speaking your goals out loud. Whether it's with a trusted friend, a mentor, or even your barista at Starbucks, take the time to SPEAK YOUR DREAMS. You might be surprised by the impact it can have on the trajectory of your goals. ABRACADABRA let your word be your wand! I hope this message finds you well. Today, I want to share a personal story that sparked a significant shift in my perspective on money. It involves a conversation with my daughter Sophie when she was just 4 years old. As we were walking to school, she asked for the latest FURREAL pet doll. She already had one and I said: “Sophie, money doesn’t grow on trees,” she paused for a moment and replied, “In fact, Mom, it does; it’s made of paper.”
In that moment, I chuckled and began to reflect on my own beliefs about money. In any area I want to elevate I get a coach, and my money coach, suggested that the income of my five closest friends or associates often reflects the upper limit of my own potential income. Skeptical but intrigued, I decided to put this theory to the test and discovered an interesting realization – I had very little knowledge about the financial details of my closest friends. We talk about our kids, dreams, and health, but why not about money? Breaking the taboo around money conversations became a game to me. I started engaging in open discussions about financial goals, dreams tied to money, and even shared my previously secret financial information. I also invited them to do the same. What unfolded was a sense of relief among us. Suddenly, we were free to discuss something that impacts us all but often remains an unspoken subject. As I delved into these open conversations, something remarkable happened. Not only did we all start making more money, but also began to see pathways to create residual and passive income. The limiting beliefs I held about money started to dissolve as I learned from the actions my friends were taking and shared insights with them, creating a win-win scenario. The result of this openness was a transformation in various aspects of my life:
Feel free to share your experiences as you engage in open conversations about money. Let’s create a community where we can support each other in our financial journeys. Today, I want to delve into the power of accountability – the key that unlocks personal growth, empowers others, and truly opens the world of performance and success.
Accountability: A Valuable Currency In the currency of personal development, accountability is the gold standard. It's not just about meeting deadlines or fulfilling responsibilities; it's about the commitment to one's own growth and the empowerment of those around us. Holding Yourself to Account Self-accountability is the foundation upon which success is built. It involves setting clear goals, tracking progress, and taking responsibility for our actions. When we hold ourselves to account, we foster discipline, resilience, and a mindset that turns challenges into opportunities. Oftentimes people have a stronger muscle at keeping their word to others while their word to themselves proves less strong. Empowering Others through Accountability Accountability isn't a solo endeavor – it's a team sport. By empowering others to be accountable, we create an environment that thrives on mutual support, performance and shared success. Encouraging accountability within a group fosters a culture of trust, collaboration, and continuous elevation. The Power of Opening an Account at this powerful BANK Just as you open a financial account to manage your wealth, consider opening an account in the bank of accountability (not to be confused with the other BOA) to manage your personal and professional growth. This account becomes a ledger of your commitments, accomplishments, and the lessons learned along the way. Steps to Open Your Accountability Account: Define Your Goals: Clearly articulate what you want to achieve. Make your goals specific, measurable, and time-bound. Create a Plan: Develop a roadmap outlining the action steps needed to reach your goals. This plan becomes the blueprint for your journey. Track Your Progress: Regularly assess your actions against your plan. Celebrate successes and adjust course if necessary. (weekly at minimum) Reflect and Learn: Embrace setbacks as opportunities for learning. Reflect on what messed with you, extract valuable lessons, and apply them moving forward. Empowering Others to Open Their Accounts: Lead by Example: Demonstrate a commitment to your own accountability and allow others to hold YOU to account, inspiring others to do the same. Encourage Goal Setting: Support your team in defining their goals, ensuring they align with both individual and collective objectives. Make sure they have "by whens" for every goal. Provide Resources: Offer the tools and resources needed for success, whether it's training, coaching, mentorship, or collaborative platforms. Celebrate Achievements: Acknowledge and celebrate individual and team accomplishments, reinforcing the importance of accountability. Remember, the account of accountability is not just about keeping score; it's about fostering a mindset that propels you and those around you towards continuous improvement and success in performance and therefore results! As we step into a new phase, I wanted to share a little perspective on goal setting that has been a game-changer for me.
Let's talk about GOAL setting – not just any goals, but the kind that ignites a spark within and propels us forward. Picture this: treating goal setting like a game rather than an expectation. Intrigued? Allow me to share why I've adopted this mindset and how it has transformed my approach. In the grand scheme of life, we often find ourselves juggling numerous responsibilities, expectations, and intentions. It's easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of our objectives, turning them into burdens that weigh us down. However, what if we approached our goals like a game – a challenge meant to be taken on with enthusiasm and a spirit of adventure? Games are inherently enjoyable. They evoke a sense of playfulness, curiosity, and the thrill of overcoming obstacles. Imagine infusing these elements into your goal-setting process. Suddenly, the journey becomes as significant as the destination, and every step forward feels like a component of victory. When we treat our goals as a game, it allows room for experimentation, learning, and adaptation. Just like in a game, there are levels to conquer, skills to develop, and surprises along the way. The fear of failure diminishes as we embrace the idea that setbacks are merely part of the game – opportunities to learn and level up. Consider setting milestones as checkpoints in your game, each one bringing you closer to the ultimate prize. Celebrate these small wins, relishing in the progress you've made as well as adjusting actions based on shortfalls. By doing so, you shift the focus from the end goal to the joy of the journey, making the pursuit itself immensely rewarding. Moreover, the game of goal setting encourages a healthy balance between ambition and flexibility. Games have rules, but they also allow for creativity and strategic thinking. Similarly, your goals can have a structure, yet be open to adjustments based on the ever-changing dynamics of life. As we dive into this game of goals, let's remember that the real magic happens when we savor the process, embrace challenges with an unmessablewith spirit, and celebrate every achievement – big or small. Life is too short to turn our dreams into a prison of expectations. So, here's to approaching our goals with a playful mindset, navigating the twists and turns with a sense of adventure, and reveling in the joy of the game. People often think when I say "you need nothing" that I mean "you don't need anything"...That is NOT what I mean.
When I say you need nothing, I am pointing to that you need a blank canvas to create. You need a space with nothing in it to actually create. The question becomes "how do I create nothing?". Let's dive into the 4-step process I outlined: Step 1: Pick an area or a relationship that you want to create something new in. Reflect on the person or area Begin by jotting down everything you know about the area or person you're focusing on. Embrace the good, the bad, and the challenges. This could pertain to personal growth, relationships, or any facet of your life. Step 2: Uncover Limiting Beliefs List all the reasons you believe you don't have what you want in that specific area/relationship. These might be lingering doubts, self-imposed limitations, or past experiences that are holding you back. Take a moment to distinguish these beliefs. Step 3: Have a talk with yourself in the Mirror Read your list aloud in front of a mirror, repeating it three times. This step invites self-reflection, encouraging you to name the limiting beliefs or thoughts that may be hindering your progress. Step 4: Release and Create Now, take the paper, tear it up, and let it go. YES TEAR IT UP! This symbolic act represents shedding old beliefs and making room for fresh possibilities. Look at the situation or person anew and ask, "What do I want to create?" Identify the actions needed to bring your vision to life and schedule them in your calendar. I'll share a personal example to illustrate. I had reservations about yoga, citing reasons like not being a morning person or feeling too fast-paced for it or YOGA is dangerous, in fact I slipped a disc doing YOGA years ago. However, by committing to yoga classes, incorporating walks and circuit training, I've transformed my perspective. Now, these actions are in my calendar, and I'm on track to realizing my vision of being long lean and sexy!. I found this process to be liberating, and I thought you might resonate with it too. Remember, our limitations often exist in our minds, and by releasing old beliefs, we create space for positive change. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. Archives
April 2024
Categories |
©2022 by The Art Of Being Unmessablewith. Site powered by Attack Cat Creative LLC
|