With 4th of July coming up. Many of you may be planning family get togethers. This is of course AMAZING, unless it isnt. Sometimes holidays with those we love can also be a breading ground for upsets or arguments.
This interview was designed to support people in creating a peaceful, upset-free holiday.
Successful leaders master the skill of management . . . that is, self-management before managing others.
The ability to identify, understand and manage your own triggers is an essential leadership skill. Making sound decisions, pursuing long-term goals and adopting an authentic leadership posture is all dependent on self-regulation in the face of internal and external obstacles.
On The Enlightened Executive podcast, I joined host, Susan Drumm, to discuss transforming your internal landscape to respond to life's challenges and triggers in a way that aligns with your aspirations.
My unique coaching program, the Art Of Being Unmessablewith, helps people stay true to themselves and maintain a mindset of creation rather than reaction. In this episode, I share three crucial tools executives can implement in order to be unmessablewith.
I also share…
Tune in now:
Do you ever find yourself comparing yourself to others? Measuring your worth based on what you perceive others have or do? Perhaps you even experience feelings of superiority or inferiority in comparison to others?
If so, welcome to the human race. Comparison is one of the most common things that "mess with people" I've encountered while working with over 200,000 people over the past 35 years.
However, when you are engaged in comparison, you cannot fully embrace the act of creation. There's no such thing as being "a little bit pregnant" when it comes to creating. You are either in a space of comparison or a space of creation.
The way to break free from the "comparison syndrome" is to imagine yourself as nothing.
Yes, you heard me right—imagine yourself as nothing.
Picture a blank canvas or an empty page. If there were nothing there, what would you create? In this state of creative emptiness, there is no room for notions of being better or worse than others, including an outdated version of yourself. Instead, you can focus on who you are and who you want to be, what excites you, and what self-expression or passion emerges for this newly created version of yourself.
If this sounds complex, here are simple steps to follow the next time you catch yourself comparing:
Observe what unfolds as you begin exercising the muscle of creation rather than the muscle of comparison.
Remember, the journey of self-creation is unique and personal. By focusing on your own growth and self-expression, you can break free from the confines of comparison and embrace the endless possibilities that exist as a creation.
Wishing you an unmessablewith and transformative journey of creation.
Do you ever feel stuck? Have you considered that your pictures are the bars of your prison?
When I work with individuals to help them become unmessablewith, no matter what life throws at them, one crucial aspect we address is identifying what currently messes with them.
Invariably, one factor that messes with people is their fixed ideas or expectations of how things "should" be, how people "should" be, or how they "should" behave.
When you have a rigid picture of how someone or something should be, their true essence and reality are missed because your perception is filtered through that picture. Your experience of them becomes distorted by your preconceived notions. Consequently, you never truly connect with who they really are or what is actually happening.
For example, if you believe your partner should spend more time with you, you may overlook or fail to appreciate the time they do spend with you because it doesn't align with the picture in your mind of how much time it "should" be. This confines you within a prison of expectations, preventing you from embracing the present reality. Instead of experiencing freedom, joy, and authentic expression in your relationship, you feel limited and constrained, much like a prisoner.
By recognizing your pictures for what they are—mere mental constructs and not reality—you can shift your perspective. Rather than measuring everything against an idealized picture, you can choose to be fully present with your partner, appreciating the time you do spend together. This liberates you from the confines of your pictures and allows for the possibility of creating something new. You cannot create on top of an existing picture; you can only compare. Creation requires setting your pictures aside, creating a space of emptiness from which you can generate new possibilities.
The next time you feel trapped, constrained, or stuck, consider that there may be a picture influencing your perception, coloring your experience.
Once you identify the picture, you can redirect your focus and approach situations with a fresh perspective, free from the limitations of preconceived notions. Simply be there, present with the person or situation, without the filter of your pictures or expectations.
I encourage you to give it a try and discover for yourself what unfolds. I'd love to hear about your personal insights and discoveries.